Things I didn’t know I needed this summer

1.  To be loved

By ME. Discover my self again. Realise I’m a hoot with a heart. I spend so much time being hard on myself and finding faults or seeking to do better that I often forget I’m doing my best, I deserve some rest and it’s okay, IT IS OKAY, to not be perfect all of the time. More importantly, I need no one’s validation nor adulation to prove I am lovable. This summer I want me to be my favourite person to get to know and hang out with.

2.  Be free

Of my own expectations. The shackles holding me back are of my own mind’s construct. The disappointments I repeatedly face, are due to my own high bars. I need to take a step back, reassess my goals, breathe free and rise above. What I can dream today, I can achieve tomorrow. 

3.  Be mindful

More mindful. Of what I allow to touch my soul. Be it negativity, junk food, never-ending cheat days, toxic relationship, toxic masculinity. Nothing should have the power to steal the wind beneath my wings. I am what I allow myself to be. I allow what I feel for. What feels right. What makes me feel right, in mind and in body. Wellness over fitness, mindfulness over mental space. 

4.  Be greedy

To go for what I know I deserve and have earned. To not submit before others, to no longer bow or kowtow. To have no regard for what others will think of me. Need, yearn and pine for my heart’s deepest desire and then go ahead and grab it with both hands. Make no apologies, take no prisoners. I owe no one my successes, just like my failures are my own. 

5.  Be quiet

The world in technicolour is a loud, sleepless place. There’s no rest for the weary. A thousand things go on my mind at any given point of time. A hundred voices are aimed at me every second of every day. Some I agree with, most I don’t. Some make me shout, some scream, some screech and some cringe. But before giving in to my inner voice, I should take a pause. AND LISTEN. Not just hear. Imbibe. Understand what’s happening around me, where it’s stemming from and, more importantly, where it’s headed towards. Analyze. For a moment, just be quiet so I can be loved, free, mindful and greedy while happily co-existing. 

 

What did you not know you needed this summer? Tell me, I am listening. Try me, I will be mindful. Follow me, for I’ll let you partake of my greed, love yourself, as I am going to love us both.

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Why A Poet #10

And in that very moment

I learnt

What it meant

To grow up

You see

It comprises

A lot of unspoken words

A few unkept promises

A dozen unshed tears

Some silent screams

And a hope

The hope

That life goes on

And in the end

It’ll all make sense

Even if it doesn’t

It’ll be a worthwhile ride

For sometimes

The journey

Is its own reward

And, hence,

I’ve decided

To write some more.

The Best Told Tales

The best stories are the ones told without an audience. No strained ears hanging to every uttered word. No tear filled eyes ready to brim over. No sighs, no smiles, no oohs and no aahs. Just a resounding silence. Those are the tales which are truer than true. For you don’t perform them for accolades, appreciation or thunderous applause. You string words together, purely reflecting your inner mind, for no one’s reaction guides the unraveling of these yarns. You don’t pause to consider what others would think. You don’t choose your words for the reactions they incite.

And that’s when a story comes to life. Like a living, breathing entity, taking a form of its own. And you can sit back and mull over the elusive magic of wondrous creation.

Spiritual

The walls start to close in on me

Every time I find myself sitting idle

In an empty room

My head feels light

My chest too heavy

My tongue waters too much

But my throat is always parched

The lights seem to dim

And I hear a deep sigh

Emanate from somewhere within me

Yet very alien

And I start losing all sense of self

I transcend my corporeal presence

Till my conscience is all I am

And then I fly

Through those very walls

And am one with the world

I travel far and wide

Unlocking mysteries with my mind

Passing more than a few portals

And time ceases to be all encompassing

Till I wake up the next morning

With my head still feeling light

But all my burdens have been lifted

And the world is set right

Peeping Tom

I watch a game of hide-and-go-seek

Played out every night

Between the night-blooming jasmine

Outside my bedroom window

And the celestial traveller of the dark

Sometime hiding

Behind a puff of cloud

Like a cotton ball gone rogue

And sometimes

Sometimes

It wraps itself inside a blanket of inky blue

Peeking out only a tad

The rest out of view

And I swear

I can almost hear

The flower giggle at these antics

Blooming slightly more

While Mr. Moon

From up high above

Winks

And takes a bow.

Mum’s the Word

I was just a girl

With a whole lot to say

But lips sewn tightly shut.


You gave me a pen

And a scrape of waste paper

And the stitches fell away.


Words flew

Bled

And oozed

Across the dirty, stained page.


By the time I was done

I was undone.


As I watched every surface

Slowly overrun with scribbles

I allowed myself to smile.


For I was just a girl

With a whole lot to say

But lips sewn tightly shut


Yet, till the time I have words

At my mercy

I’ll always find a way.