Have you ever experienced the kind of scream so desperate that it rips you apart and, yet, fails to make a single sound? The one where you’re crying out with every iota of your being but your voice gets caught in your throat? You’re not choking, no, you’re only unable to speak. You can hear it inside your head, though.
It begins like any other scream, sans, of course, any sound, but as it proceeds, taking its time, you start getting gripped by a paralyzing fear. You’re overtaken by a growing confusion. Not understanding what’s happening. Panicking, you try to scream even louder, your vocal chords getting strained beyond capacity. Your eyes widen, terrified. You feel like your end is near. You try flailing your limbs in retaliation, as an attempt to free yourself – only to find you cannot do that either.
Have you ever been so helpless and so scared? When you wake up from this dream, do you find yourself drenched in sweat? Your heart working double time trying to calm its palpitations? Do you find your knuckles turned white and your fist clenched so tight that your nails managed to dig into your skin and have drawn streaks of blood? Do you find the ghostly remnants of your scream still lingering on your mind, haunting and knowing?
Because, I do.